1
00:00:03,267 --> 00:00:04,634
   MAYA: Previously on
  Just Shoot Me.

2
00:00:04,701 --> 00:00:07,133
 Dad, I know
 this divorce has
 been hard on you.

3
00:00:07,200 --> 00:00:08,567
  It's been hard
  on everyone.

4
00:00:08,634 --> 00:00:10,868
 I hate the fact
 you guys aren't
 together anymore,

5
00:00:10,934 --> 00:00:14,167
 but I know
 there's nothing
 we can do about it.

6
00:00:14,234 --> 00:00:15,734
 You gotta move on.

7
00:00:15,801 --> 00:00:19,100
  I'm talking about
  Tyra Banks
  for the cover.

8
00:00:19,167 --> 00:00:21,367
 Don't you have
 a huge crush on her?

9
00:00:21,434 --> 00:00:24,601
  Maya, I deal
  with supermodels
  on a daily basis

10
00:00:24,667 --> 00:00:28,234
   and I can assure you
   that I love her
   so much it hurts.

11
00:00:30,334 --> 00:00:31,667
 Why are you two
 holding hands?

12
00:00:31,734 --> 00:00:33,567
 Why are you wearing
 the same thing
 as last night?

13
00:00:33,634 --> 00:00:35,200
Before you jump
to any conclusions,

14
00:00:35,267 --> 00:00:38,000
there's a perfectly
good explanation.

15
00:00:38,067 --> 00:00:40,400
 Your father
 and I had sex.

16
00:00:40,467 --> 00:00:41,634
   You two had sex?

17
00:00:42,801 --> 00:00:44,033
   What's this?

18
00:00:44,100 --> 00:00:47,567
 It's a stun gun.
 The latest
 spy technology.

19
00:00:49,567 --> 00:00:51,300
   (ELECTRIC BUZZING)

20
00:00:52,601 --> 00:00:54,567
That's cute.

21
00:00:54,634 --> 00:00:56,367
  Tyra's on her way up.

22
00:00:56,434 --> 00:00:58,501
   Oh, I told you
   to stop playing
   with that thing.

23
00:00:58,567 --> 00:01:00,868
   Oh, it doesn't
   work anyway. See?

24
00:01:06,501 --> 00:01:08,033
 (EXCLAIMS)

25
00:01:08,100 --> 00:01:11,234
 Oh, Elliott, it's nice
 to finally meet you.

26
00:01:11,300 --> 00:01:13,934
   (MUMBLING)

27
00:01:15,033 --> 00:01:17,400
You know what,
you are scaring me.

28
00:01:17,467 --> 00:01:19,133
(EXCLAIMS)

29
00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:20,767
 Get away from me,
 you freak!

30
00:01:20,834 --> 00:01:22,868
(SCREAMING)

31
00:01:24,167 --> 00:01:26,000
  Miss Van Horn
  and I are...

32
00:01:26,067 --> 00:01:28,901
  We're all through running
  around like a couple
  of crazy teenagers.

33
00:01:28,968 --> 00:01:30,100
  Thank God.

34
00:01:30,167 --> 00:01:33,100
  That's right.
  We're getting married!

35
00:01:33,167 --> 00:01:34,434
   What?

36
00:01:34,501 --> 00:01:37,467
 Come on, Dennis.
 Give your
 stepmom a big hug.

37
00:01:55,667 --> 00:01:57,501
   RED: Dennis.

38
00:01:57,567 --> 00:01:58,734
 Dennis, didn't you
 hear what we said?

39
00:01:58,801 --> 00:02:01,501
   Nina and I
   are getting married.

40
00:02:01,567 --> 00:02:03,467
   What's wrong
   with him?

41
00:02:06,868 --> 00:02:09,000
He's gone
to his happy place.

42
00:02:10,434 --> 00:02:11,434
 His happy place?

43
00:02:11,501 --> 00:02:14,100
Yeah, he does this
whenever he gets upset.

44
00:02:14,167 --> 00:02:17,801
   God only knows
   what goes on inside
   that little head of his.

45
00:02:18,968 --> 00:02:20,534
 (CLOCK TICKING)

46
00:02:26,467 --> 00:02:27,467
  (EXCLAIMS)

47
00:02:27,534 --> 00:02:30,501
  I won! Yay for me!

48
00:02:30,567 --> 00:02:32,100
 You lost. You suck.

49
00:02:32,167 --> 00:02:33,968
  (IMITATING CRYING)
  I want my mommy.

50
00:02:34,033 --> 00:02:35,434
 (EXCLAIMING)

51
00:02:41,567 --> 00:02:44,100
Dennis! Dennis!

52
00:02:44,701 --> 00:02:46,400
Is he okay?

53
00:02:46,467 --> 00:02:48,834
  Yeah. There's only
  one thing that can
  snap him out of this.

54
00:02:48,901 --> 00:02:50,701
 Dennis, your math
 tutor is here.

55
00:02:50,767 --> 00:02:54,133
 Margie? Margie?

56
00:02:54,200 --> 00:02:57,667
 Three bucks an hour,
 all he did was
 stare at her bosoms.

57
00:03:04,901 --> 00:03:07,300
 Do you think
 Spider-Man eats bugs?

58
00:03:09,133 --> 00:03:10,934
  Why are you here?

59
00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:14,667
  Dennis is in my office
  trying to deal with
  his dad's engagement.

60
00:03:14,734 --> 00:03:18,667
   Poor guy,
   I'm giving him a little time
   to pull himself together.

61
00:03:19,767 --> 00:03:20,968
   That's sweet of you.

62
00:03:21,033 --> 00:03:23,100
  He's got three minutes.

63
00:03:23,167 --> 00:03:24,501
  What?

64
00:03:24,567 --> 00:03:27,200
 The Ernest Hemingway auction
 is about to start in London

65
00:03:27,267 --> 00:03:28,801
  and I need him
  to phone in a bid.

66
00:03:28,868 --> 00:03:30,767
   So, what are you
   gonna bid on?

67
00:03:30,834 --> 00:03:32,534
 Something for
 my living room.

68
00:03:32,601 --> 00:03:35,567
 Maybe an elephant tusk
 or stuffed marlin.

69
00:03:35,634 --> 00:03:37,367
 Something dead
 to spruce up the place.

70
00:03:37,434 --> 00:03:39,100
Exactly.

71
00:03:39,167 --> 00:03:41,000
 Ooh, what about this?

72
00:03:41,067 --> 00:03:44,934
 A set of solid gold
 golf tees given to
 Hemingway by John Wayne.

73
00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:48,033
  Hemingway and John Wayne.
  I love it.

74
00:03:48,100 --> 00:03:53,667
  Just think, a set of tees
  passed from the Duke
  to Papa to The Kid.

75
00:03:55,901 --> 00:03:57,067
  The Kid?
  Who's The Kid?

76
00:03:57,133 --> 00:04:00,100
   I'm The Kid,
   as of now.

77
00:04:00,167 --> 00:04:01,934
 Put out a memo.

78
00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:03,834
   (KNOCKING AT DOOR)

79
00:04:03,901 --> 00:04:05,934
 Come on, Dennis,
 stop fooling around.

80
00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:08,267
   Now get out here
   or I'll break down the door.

81
00:04:08,334 --> 00:04:11,133
 (EXHALES) He's like
 the Big Bad Wolf.

82
00:04:11,200 --> 00:04:12,534
   (GROWLING)

83
00:04:15,033 --> 00:04:17,033
 You know,
 the key's on the desk.

84
00:04:17,100 --> 00:04:19,000
 Really?
 Oh, thank you.

85
00:04:20,367 --> 00:04:21,434
Killjoy.

86
00:04:21,501 --> 00:04:22,567
 Ow.

87
00:04:25,167 --> 00:04:26,667
   What are you doing?

88
00:04:26,734 --> 00:04:27,968
Nothin'.

89
00:04:28,901 --> 00:04:29,934
  Mind if I sit?

90
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,334
   It's a free country.

91
00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:33,567
  Don't eat those things
  lying down. You'll choke.

92
00:04:33,634 --> 00:04:35,868
You've lost your privileges
to give me fatherly advice.

93
00:04:35,934 --> 00:04:37,667
 All right, then
 as a fireman, okay?

94
00:04:37,734 --> 00:04:40,701
   I've seen a lot
   of characters
   choke on snacks.

95
00:04:43,834 --> 00:04:45,968
What were you thinking?

96
00:04:46,033 --> 00:04:48,667
   You and Nina are gonna
   move back to Albany
   and live happily ever after?

97
00:04:48,734 --> 00:04:51,267
  For God sakes,
  the bars close at ten!

98
00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:54,667
Actually, I was thinking
about moving here.

99
00:04:54,734 --> 00:04:56,567
Maybe even finding
a new line of work.

100
00:04:56,634 --> 00:04:58,167
  But you love
  being a fireman.

101
00:04:58,234 --> 00:05:01,834
 I don't know.
 When you think about it,
 what do we even do?

102
00:05:01,901 --> 00:05:03,234
(STUTTERS)

103
00:05:05,167 --> 00:05:07,234
   Pull people
   from burning buildings.

104
00:05:07,300 --> 00:05:10,534
   What's the point?
   Another one goes up
   the next day.

105
00:05:12,434 --> 00:05:14,334
My God,
listen to yourself.

106
00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:16,067
   What?

107
00:05:16,133 --> 00:05:17,667
   Nina's sucking
   the life out of you.

108
00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,133
 Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!

109
00:05:19,200 --> 00:05:22,734
 What we do behind closed doors
 is none of your business.

110
00:05:27,167 --> 00:05:30,267
  You know what?
  I like Nina, a lot.

111
00:05:30,334 --> 00:05:34,000
  In a carnival
  sideshow sort of way.

112
00:05:34,067 --> 00:05:36,300
   But you shouldn't
   be marrying her.

113
00:05:36,367 --> 00:05:38,501
 Where was this tone
 of disapproval

114
00:05:38,567 --> 00:05:41,133
 when your mother
 started dating
 Mr. Fancy Preacher man?

115
00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:43,601
 (CHUCKLES) Now that guy,
 he's a real jim-dandy.

116
00:05:43,667 --> 00:05:46,601
  Mr. Wine with
  a cork. Huh?

117
00:05:46,667 --> 00:05:51,901
   Yeah, sure. Mr. Pretty Boy
   with his... With his 1% milk
   and his digital watch.

118
00:05:51,968 --> 00:05:54,133
 And what does he have
 that I don't have, huh?

119
00:05:54,200 --> 00:05:56,267
 Besides a direct line
 to God?

120
00:05:56,334 --> 00:05:59,934
 Not my God, mind you.
 My God is a vengeful God.

121
00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:17,133
 Jack!

122
00:06:17,200 --> 00:06:19,467
This Tyra Banks thing
is getting out of hand.

123
00:06:19,534 --> 00:06:22,334
   She won't take my calls.
   She refused the flowers
   I sent her.

124
00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:24,067
She thinks
I'm a slobbering idiot.

125
00:06:24,133 --> 00:06:25,667
 Well, can you
 blame her?

126
00:06:25,734 --> 00:06:29,801
 What with the foaming
 and the twitching.
 Very unprofessional.

127
00:06:29,868 --> 00:06:33,200
 If it hadn't been my fault,
 I would have fired you.

128
00:06:33,267 --> 00:06:36,400
Here. I'm dialing
Tyra's number.

129
00:06:36,467 --> 00:06:39,434
  I want you to tell her
  that I'm not crazy.

130
00:06:39,501 --> 00:06:42,567
  All right, fair enough.
  The Kid will handle this.

131
00:06:42,634 --> 00:06:44,167
 Yeah, I want you
 to tell her
 the whole truth.

132
00:06:44,234 --> 00:06:47,000
  Except for the part
  about me
  wetting my pants.

133
00:06:47,067 --> 00:06:48,467
  ON ANSWERING MACHINE:
  Hey, this is Tyra.

134
00:06:48,534 --> 00:06:50,767
  Please leave a message
  and I'll call you right back.

135
00:06:50,834 --> 00:06:52,334
 (BEEPS)

136
00:06:52,400 --> 00:06:54,400
    ON SPEAKER:
    Tyra, Jack Gallo.

137
00:06:54,467 --> 00:06:56,000
  About the other day
  with Elliott,

138
00:06:56,067 --> 00:06:59,734
 he's gonna explain
 what happened
 and I vouch for every word.

139
00:06:59,801 --> 00:07:01,267
 Elliott, take it away.

140
00:07:01,334 --> 00:07:03,868
 (SCREAMING) Tyra!

141
00:07:09,968 --> 00:07:14,033
 You know, you're not helping
 yourself when you
 act crazy like that.

142
00:07:21,901 --> 00:07:23,300
 There he is.

143
00:07:24,701 --> 00:07:25,734
 What are you wearing?

144
00:07:25,801 --> 00:07:27,334
Oh, we've been
to Barneys.

145
00:07:27,400 --> 00:07:28,567
   You like the new
   duds, huh?

146
00:07:28,634 --> 00:07:30,601
   I'm even wearing
   silk shorts.

147
00:07:30,667 --> 00:07:34,567
Feels like my privates
are resting on a cloud.

148
00:07:34,634 --> 00:07:38,100
Here. I noticed
some of your clothes
looked a little worn.

149
00:07:38,167 --> 00:07:40,267
   You bought me clothes?

150
00:07:40,334 --> 00:07:42,434
  What do you say
  to your stepmom, huh?

151
00:07:42,501 --> 00:07:43,801
   Stop calling her that.

152
00:07:43,868 --> 00:07:45,167
Try the clothes
on, Dennis.

153
00:07:45,234 --> 00:07:46,367
No!

154
00:07:46,434 --> 00:07:49,300
Oh, look,
you've got a little
smudge right here.

155
00:07:49,367 --> 00:07:50,501
  What are you doing?

156
00:07:50,567 --> 00:07:52,534
Oh, now don't be afraid
to be mothered.

157
00:07:52,601 --> 00:07:55,133
 I'm not afraid to be mothered.
 I'm afraid of your saliva.

158
00:07:55,200 --> 00:07:58,400
 I just rented  Outbreak.

159
00:07:58,467 --> 00:08:01,100
  I want you to get to know
  your stepmom better.

160
00:08:01,167 --> 00:08:04,934
 Me? I've known her forever.
 It's you two that don't know
 what you're getting into.

161
00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:08,067
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
I'm not as square
as you think I am.

162
00:08:08,133 --> 00:08:10,234
I've been line dancing.

163
00:08:10,300 --> 00:08:11,801
 NINA: (CHUCKLES) Yeah.

164
00:08:11,868 --> 00:08:13,501
 And tonight
 we're going club-hopping
 with my friend Binnie

165
00:08:13,567 --> 00:08:15,033
 and that sexually
 ambiguous couple

166
00:08:15,100 --> 00:08:16,567
 who train her
 on the trampoline.

167
00:08:16,634 --> 00:08:18,667
 (CHUCKLING)
 It sounds like
 fun, huh?

168
00:08:18,734 --> 00:08:20,534
 Fun?

169
00:08:20,601 --> 00:08:24,100
 What happened to the guy
 that chased the road company
 of  Hair out of town?

170
00:08:24,167 --> 00:08:26,200
 Nina, could you excuse
 the men for a second?

171
00:08:26,267 --> 00:08:28,901
 Oh, when you talk
 like that it makes me just
 want to curl up in a little...

172
00:08:28,968 --> 00:08:30,067
 Back off, Nina.

173
00:08:30,133 --> 00:08:32,634
Hey, you're not
too old
for a spanking.

174
00:08:32,701 --> 00:08:34,601
   And I hope
   I never am.

175
00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:41,434
Dennis. Dennis.
Dennis.

176
00:08:41,501 --> 00:08:44,567
 I can read you
 like a breakfast menu.

177
00:08:44,634 --> 00:08:46,234
  I think I know
  what's bothering you.

178
00:08:46,300 --> 00:08:47,601
 I told you
 what's bothering me.

179
00:08:47,667 --> 00:08:49,400
 You're marrying someone
 you don't know.

180
00:08:49,467 --> 00:08:51,434
   That's not it.

181
00:08:51,501 --> 00:08:54,334
   It's like that TV movie,
    I'm Your New Mom.

182
00:08:56,367 --> 00:09:01,033
Tom Skerritt plays Crocker,
a grizzled old
something or other.

183
00:09:01,100 --> 00:09:03,801
  Who's haunted
  by his past.

184
00:09:03,868 --> 00:09:08,400
 Susan Dey plays
 the therapist who's trying
 to help him remember...

185
00:09:08,467 --> 00:09:10,200
   Or forget...

186
00:09:10,267 --> 00:09:12,200
 I forget.

187
00:09:12,267 --> 00:09:16,033
 Anyway, naturally
 they fall in love.
 And all is swell.

188
00:09:16,100 --> 00:09:19,434
   Except with
   Crocker's daughter.

189
00:09:19,501 --> 00:09:22,300
   The saucy girl
   from  Growing Pains.

190
00:09:22,367 --> 00:09:23,801
   Oh, I like her.

191
00:09:23,868 --> 00:09:26,734
  Yeah. She's good.
  She's always
  understated.

192
00:09:26,801 --> 00:09:28,601
Hmm.

193
00:09:28,667 --> 00:09:31,834
  Anyway, she has a problem
  with her new stepmom

194
00:09:31,901 --> 00:09:35,434
  and it's not till
  after her descent
  into madness

195
00:09:35,501 --> 00:09:38,167
  and then
  the blizzard,

196
00:09:38,234 --> 00:09:42,200
 that she realizes
 how much she needs
 her stepmom.

197
00:09:43,300 --> 00:09:44,834
Don't you see?

198
00:09:45,467 --> 00:09:48,200
 Dennis. Dennis!

199
00:09:48,267 --> 00:09:51,200
  You're the saucy girl
  from  Growing Pains!

200
00:09:52,934 --> 00:09:54,968
  (GRUNTING IN FRUSTRATION)

201
00:09:56,701 --> 00:09:58,200
 What?

202
00:09:58,267 --> 00:10:01,901
My dad and Nina are about
to make the biggest mistake
of their lives,

203
00:10:01,968 --> 00:10:04,834
and Nina went camping
with Ike Turner once.

204
00:10:07,467 --> 00:10:09,434
Let me tell you
a little story.

205
00:10:09,501 --> 00:10:12,067
   What is this, story day?

206
00:10:12,133 --> 00:10:15,601
 The only memo I got
 was about
 calling Jack "The Kid."

207
00:10:18,434 --> 00:10:20,167
   All right,
   I'll skip the story.

208
00:10:20,234 --> 00:10:21,734
But it's pretty moving.

209
00:10:21,801 --> 00:10:25,734
It's about a dog
and a hamster and a balloon
ride they'll never forget.

210
00:10:28,868 --> 00:10:31,167
   What are you talking about?

211
00:10:31,234 --> 00:10:35,734
   Sometimes the most
   unlikely pairings
   can find happiness together.

212
00:10:35,801 --> 00:10:37,300
   Who knows?

213
00:10:37,367 --> 00:10:40,834
Maybe being with Nina
is the healthiest thing
your dad has ever done.

214
00:10:40,901 --> 00:10:43,067
  Damn it, don't you
  die on me!

215
00:10:43,133 --> 00:10:45,000
 (GRUNTING)

216
00:10:46,501 --> 00:10:48,267
   Come on, Red.
   Come on, Reddy.

217
00:10:48,334 --> 00:10:50,667
   Come on, big Red.
   Come on, Red.

218
00:11:04,734 --> 00:11:06,100
   Sorry.

219
00:11:06,167 --> 00:11:07,901
   Maya?
  Hi.

220
00:11:07,968 --> 00:11:09,801
   How's he doing?
   I don't know.
   I just got here.

221
00:11:09,868 --> 00:11:11,267
 Nina called me
 looking for your number.

222
00:11:11,334 --> 00:11:13,734
I thought I'd see
if I could help.

223
00:11:13,801 --> 00:11:16,000
 DENNIS: Oh my God,
 look at him.

224
00:11:16,067 --> 00:11:19,200
  Thirty years of
  fighting fires, never
  once called in sick.

225
00:11:19,267 --> 00:11:22,901
   Three days with Nina
   and he's eating
   through a tube.

226
00:11:22,968 --> 00:11:24,534
   Hi, I'm Dr. Cooper.

227
00:11:24,601 --> 00:11:27,234
  Hi. I'm Dennis Finch,
  the patient's son.
  How is he?

228
00:11:27,300 --> 00:11:29,534
 Good news.
 He didn't have
 a heart attack.

229
00:11:29,601 --> 00:11:30,601
  (BOTH SIGH)

230
00:11:30,667 --> 00:11:32,267
 It was probably
 just anxiety.

231
00:11:32,334 --> 00:11:36,267
 Has he been under
 an unusual amount
 of stress lately?

232
00:11:36,334 --> 00:11:39,300
 Oh, great.
 Now there's a tube
 in his arm!

233
00:11:39,367 --> 00:11:42,734
   (CRYING) Oh, why does
   everything have
   to happen to me?

234
00:11:43,667 --> 00:11:45,200
 Nina.

235
00:11:45,267 --> 00:11:48,634
 Oh, I can't bear
 to see him like this.
 Doctor, pull the plug.

236
00:11:51,167 --> 00:11:52,601
   I'm not going
   to pull the plug.

237
00:11:52,667 --> 00:11:55,200
   Oh, it's okay.
   I'm practically his wife.

238
00:11:55,267 --> 00:11:57,634
Nina, he's not
even dying.

239
00:11:57,701 --> 00:11:58,901
How's that?

240
00:11:58,968 --> 00:12:00,767
He's gonna be fine.
He just had
an anxiety attack.

241
00:12:00,834 --> 00:12:02,300
 Anxiety?

242
00:12:02,367 --> 00:12:03,601
  (SIGHS)

243
00:12:08,767 --> 00:12:10,167
Thank you.

244
00:12:10,234 --> 00:12:11,267
 Those weren't for you!

245
00:12:11,334 --> 00:12:13,400
 Oh, sorry.
 How much do I owe you?

246
00:12:13,467 --> 00:12:15,534
  (SIGHS)

247
00:12:15,601 --> 00:12:19,100
  You aren't, by chance,
  on any other kind of
  medication right now?

248
00:12:19,167 --> 00:12:20,501
Of course.

249
00:12:22,300 --> 00:12:24,100
 Which medication?

250
00:12:24,167 --> 00:12:27,534
  Well, I'm gonna need
  a pen, some paper,
  and a Spanish dictionary.

251
00:12:39,701 --> 00:12:41,901
 You wanted
 to see me?

252
00:12:41,968 --> 00:12:45,234
 Elliott, don't be mad.
 Have a seat.

253
00:12:45,300 --> 00:12:49,834
   No, thanks. I like it here
   where I'm two steps
   closer to the first aid kit.

254
00:12:51,467 --> 00:12:53,367
   You're overreacting.

255
00:12:53,434 --> 00:12:55,601
Am I?

256
00:12:55,667 --> 00:12:59,434
   Last night I dreamt
   I was in Tyra Banks' bedroom
   and she was calling to me.

257
00:12:59,501 --> 00:13:03,934
Come on, Elliott.
It's so lonely here
by myself.

258
00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:06,400
 Oh, this is gonna be
 so much fun.

259
00:13:07,767 --> 00:13:09,434
    ELLIOTT:
    Then you appeared.

260
00:13:09,501 --> 00:13:13,234
 Hey, Elliott.
 Check out
 my new crossbow.

261
00:13:13,300 --> 00:13:15,834
 Jack?
 Put that thing down.

262
00:13:15,901 --> 00:13:18,267
 Oh, don't worry.
 It's not loaded.

263
00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:22,734
   Ew!

264
00:13:22,801 --> 00:13:26,434
 So you'll forgive me
 if I'm "overreacting."

265
00:13:26,501 --> 00:13:29,701
  Elliott, what would
  Hemingway do
  in this situation?

266
00:13:29,767 --> 00:13:34,400
   He wouldn't fret about
   a phone message here
   or a golf ball there.

267
00:13:34,467 --> 00:13:37,567
  He'd reach out
  and take hold
  of what he wanted.

268
00:13:37,634 --> 00:13:43,033
 What I want is not
 to have to shriek
 when I go to the bathroom.

269
00:13:43,100 --> 00:13:48,334
   So, I made a few calls,
   and Tyra has agreed
   to stop by this afternoon.

270
00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:50,501
 Really?
 Well, how'd you do that?

271
00:13:50,567 --> 00:13:54,100
   How? 'Cause I'm The Kid,
   that's how.

272
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:57,534
Here's your chance
to run with the bulls.

273
00:13:57,601 --> 00:13:59,300
 I appreciate it.
 Thanks, Jack.

274
00:13:59,367 --> 00:14:03,200
  Hey, and speaking of bulls,
  check out my new bullwhip.

275
00:14:05,834 --> 00:14:08,000
 I just got back
 from the hospital.

276
00:14:08,067 --> 00:14:09,133
 How's Red doing?

277
00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:11,334
He's gonna be okay.
It was
an anxiety attack.

278
00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:12,434
   (CHUCKLES)

279
00:14:12,501 --> 00:14:14,234
 Times like these
 make you realize

280
00:14:14,300 --> 00:14:16,701
 the only thing
 that's important
 is your health.

281
00:14:16,767 --> 00:14:18,167
 All that other stuff...

282
00:14:18,234 --> 00:14:19,534
 Is that my package?
   Yup.

283
00:14:19,601 --> 00:14:23,801
Hey! A man waits
his whole life
for something like this.

284
00:14:23,868 --> 00:14:27,300
   From John Wayne
   to Ernest Hemingway
   to The Kid.

285
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:29,634
  Maya, behold.

286
00:14:29,701 --> 00:14:32,000
   What the hell is this?

287
00:14:32,067 --> 00:14:34,200
 Looks like a tea set.

288
00:14:34,267 --> 00:14:38,701
   I know it's a tea set.
   It's supposed to be
   a set of tees! Golf tees!

289
00:14:38,767 --> 00:14:40,400
 I think
 it's kind of cute.

290
00:14:40,467 --> 00:14:42,234
 Cute?

291
00:14:42,300 --> 00:14:44,901
  The Kid
  is not about cute.

292
00:14:44,968 --> 00:14:47,767
   The Kid is about
   bullfights and bar fights

293
00:14:47,834 --> 00:14:50,167
  and old fishermen
  and young whores.

294
00:14:50,234 --> 00:14:52,734
Cute!
Cute makes me sick!

295
00:14:52,801 --> 00:14:54,801
I was only
trying to help.

296
00:14:57,534 --> 00:14:59,300
   It is kind of cute.

297
00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:09,701
  Hey!

298
00:15:09,767 --> 00:15:12,634
   Hey, Dad.
   You feeling all right?

299
00:15:12,701 --> 00:15:13,734
  What happened?

300
00:15:13,801 --> 00:15:15,367
 You had
 an anxiety attack.

301
00:15:15,434 --> 00:15:17,701
   An anxiety attack?

302
00:15:17,767 --> 00:15:22,834
Oh, boy. The guys
in the firehouse are gonna
have a field day with this.

303
00:15:22,901 --> 00:15:23,901
Son, do me a favor,
will you?

304
00:15:23,968 --> 00:15:25,000
Anything.

305
00:15:25,067 --> 00:15:26,701
   Go downstairs to my car.

306
00:15:26,767 --> 00:15:28,868
In the glove compartment
you'll find a hunting knife
with an eight-inch blade,

307
00:15:28,934 --> 00:15:31,634
bring it up here
and jam it into my leg.

308
00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:35,234
It's nothing
to be ashamed of.

309
00:15:35,300 --> 00:15:36,667
   (SIGHS)

310
00:15:36,734 --> 00:15:38,100
 You're not
 the first guy Nina's
 put in the hospital.

311
00:15:38,167 --> 00:15:41,734
 In fact,
 you're not the fourth.

312
00:15:41,801 --> 00:15:44,667
   Don't put everything on her.
   I didn't do anything
   I didn't want to do.

313
00:15:44,734 --> 00:15:45,901
  Although...

314
00:15:45,968 --> 00:15:47,767
What?

315
00:15:47,834 --> 00:15:49,968
  Well, Dennis, you've been
  with a lot of
  different women, right?

316
00:15:50,033 --> 00:15:52,200
 (CHUCKLES)
 I do okay, yeah.

317
00:15:54,834 --> 00:15:58,434
I want to ask you
a question, man to man.

318
00:15:58,501 --> 00:16:02,767
  Is it normal
  for your partner to say,
  "Trust me" and then...

319
00:16:02,834 --> 00:16:05,167
 RED: That's it.
 That's it.

320
00:16:05,234 --> 00:16:06,968
 That's it,
 your color's
 coming back,

321
00:16:07,033 --> 00:16:08,701
 now what there is
 of it. Yeah.

322
00:16:08,767 --> 00:16:09,767
 (MOANING)

323
00:16:09,834 --> 00:16:11,634
 I'll be fine.

324
00:16:11,701 --> 00:16:14,801
   I'll just pretend
   that's something
   I read in a book.

325
00:16:14,868 --> 00:16:15,968
   Scooch over,
   will you?

326
00:16:16,033 --> 00:16:18,901
   Oh, yeah.

327
00:16:18,968 --> 00:16:25,100
   Dad, I'm sorry I've been
   such a pain in the ass
   the last couple of days.

328
00:16:25,167 --> 00:16:26,934
And if you want
to marry Nina,
that's fine.

329
00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:31,367
She's a great girl and
I think she'll make you
really happy.

330
00:16:31,434 --> 00:16:32,968
 What if I don't
 want to marry her?

331
00:16:33,033 --> 00:16:36,534
Great. I'm begging you,
please don't.

332
00:16:36,601 --> 00:16:40,400
  The thing is,
  you know, Nina's great,
  but she's like...

333
00:16:40,467 --> 00:16:42,567
 She's like candied apples.

334
00:16:42,634 --> 00:16:45,834
  Once a year
  at the harvest festival,
  boy, it's a real treat.

335
00:16:45,901 --> 00:16:48,033
  But you can't
  have one every day.

336
00:16:48,100 --> 00:16:52,033
   And certainly not
   three times in one night.

337
00:16:52,100 --> 00:16:54,334
   Stay with me.
   Stay with me, boy.
   Stay with me.

338
00:16:54,400 --> 00:16:56,300
 (GROANS)

339
00:16:56,367 --> 00:16:59,367
  Dad... Dad,
  if you're having your doubts,
  you've got to break it off.

340
00:16:59,434 --> 00:17:03,501
 No. No. No.
 I made a commitment.
 I intend to live up to it.

341
00:17:03,567 --> 00:17:05,667
  You can't get married
  if you know
  it's not gonna work.

342
00:17:05,734 --> 00:17:08,901
 The hell I can't!
 That's the trouble
 with your generation.

343
00:17:08,968 --> 00:17:11,501
No, you expect
everything
to be perfect.

344
00:17:11,567 --> 00:17:14,567
   Happy marriages,
   clean air,
   lead-free paint.

345
00:17:14,634 --> 00:17:16,300
 (EXCLAIMS)

346
00:17:16,367 --> 00:17:17,834
  So you're gonna go
  through with it
  even if it kills you?

347
00:17:17,901 --> 00:17:19,200
 Absolutely.

348
00:17:19,267 --> 00:17:21,133
 Like my friend Binnie says,
 "Never steal a police car

349
00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:25,934
 "unless you're prepared
 to floor it
 all the way to Mexico."

350
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:29,300
   Oh, my God, Dad,
   you just said,
   "My friend, Binnie."

351
00:17:29,367 --> 00:17:30,734
  I'm scared.

352
00:17:33,167 --> 00:17:34,634
 So am I, Son.

353
00:17:35,734 --> 00:17:37,000
So am I.

354
00:17:44,934 --> 00:17:46,300
 She's here.

355
00:17:46,367 --> 00:17:48,534
Tyra's in the building.
She's on her way up.

356
00:17:48,601 --> 00:17:49,767
  (SIGHING)

357
00:17:49,834 --> 00:17:51,734
 Wonderful.
 Shouldn't you
 be out there?

358
00:17:51,801 --> 00:17:53,467
   Yeah, I should be.

359
00:17:56,467 --> 00:17:58,067
   You know, it's just...

360
00:17:58,133 --> 00:18:00,100
  It's gone wrong
  so many times,
  I'm a little nervous.

361
00:18:00,167 --> 00:18:02,567
 Are you saying
 you can't face a woman?

362
00:18:02,634 --> 00:18:04,767
   Come on, be a man.

363
00:18:06,934 --> 00:18:09,067
  Is that
  your tea set, Jack?

364
00:18:10,634 --> 00:18:13,033
Yes, would you like some?
It's chamomile.

365
00:18:13,100 --> 00:18:15,601
   That set's
   a little dainty,
   isn't it?

366
00:18:16,300 --> 00:18:17,567
  Dainty?

367
00:18:17,634 --> 00:18:20,634
I'll have you know
this used to belong
to Hemingway.

368
00:18:20,701 --> 00:18:22,367
Mariel or Margaux?

369
00:18:24,567 --> 00:18:27,434
 Elliott, Tyra Banks
 is out there
 waiting for you.

370
00:18:27,501 --> 00:18:28,801
  (EXHALES)

371
00:18:29,801 --> 00:18:31,501
   Okay, how do I look?

372
00:18:31,567 --> 00:18:33,067
  Perfect. Here.

373
00:18:34,234 --> 00:18:36,767
 Have some tea.
 It'll calm you down.

374
00:18:37,534 --> 00:18:38,934
  (SCREAMING)

375
00:18:40,167 --> 00:18:41,701
Oh, Lord, it burns.

376
00:18:41,767 --> 00:18:44,400
 Oh, Lord, it burns.
 Oh, Lord, it burns.
 Oh, Lord, it burns.

377
00:18:44,467 --> 00:18:45,968
 (EXCLAIMS)
 I knew you were crazy!

378
00:18:46,033 --> 00:18:47,033
 Give it to me...

379
00:18:47,100 --> 00:18:48,133
   (SCREAMS)

380
00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:49,534
 Take that!

381
00:18:56,334 --> 00:18:57,868
   Hey, I'm gonna take off.

382
00:18:57,934 --> 00:18:59,467
 Well, how is he?

383
00:18:59,534 --> 00:19:00,901
 He's fine.

384
00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:04,334
What are you...
What are you doing?

385
00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:07,667
Oh, I was just going
over some wedding stuff.

386
00:19:07,734 --> 00:19:09,501
   You know, we thought
   it would be a great idea

387
00:19:09,567 --> 00:19:12,100
   if we put some
   disposable cameras
   on all the tables

388
00:19:12,167 --> 00:19:13,634
 and that way
 everybody could come up

389
00:19:13,701 --> 00:19:16,901
 and take a picture of me
 with my happy
 wedding day smile.

390
00:19:19,033 --> 00:19:20,868
What's wrong with you?

391
00:19:20,934 --> 00:19:22,868
   Nothing.

392
00:19:22,934 --> 00:19:26,267
   Nina, you only have
   that smile when cops
   come to the office.

393
00:19:26,334 --> 00:19:27,701
 (SIGHS)

394
00:19:27,767 --> 00:19:30,334
 Look, this may come
 as a surprise to you,

395
00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:34,868
  but the truth is your father
  and I really don't have
  that much in common.

396
00:19:34,934 --> 00:19:36,934
   I mean, we both know you.

397
00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:40,133
  Well, then why
  are you marrying him?

398
00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:45,400
  Because he asked me.
  I mean, what was
  I supposed to say? "No"?

399
00:19:45,467 --> 00:19:48,534
 Let me get this straight.
 You don't want
 to marry my dad.

400
00:19:48,601 --> 00:19:51,868
 (SIGHS) I just didn't know
 it was gonna be
 such a big deal.

401
00:19:51,934 --> 00:19:53,667
  Do you know
  how many times
  I've been married?

402
00:19:53,734 --> 00:19:55,000
 No.

403
00:19:55,067 --> 00:19:56,300
  Well, is there some place
  we could find out?

404
00:19:56,367 --> 00:19:59,801
Because my friend
Binnie and I
sort of have a bet.

405
00:19:59,868 --> 00:20:02,501
  Come on, Nina.
  You're heading towards
  something here.

406
00:20:02,567 --> 00:20:03,767
 (SIGHS)

407
00:20:03,834 --> 00:20:06,767
Last week, I was at
this really low point,

408
00:20:06,834 --> 00:20:10,567
  and your father
  was just so big
  and cuddly and big.

409
00:20:12,334 --> 00:20:13,434
 And?

410
00:20:14,767 --> 00:20:16,467
 I can't marry him.

411
00:20:16,534 --> 00:20:18,067
  (SOFTLY) Yes!

412
00:20:18,634 --> 00:20:20,167
That is so sad.

413
00:20:21,400 --> 00:20:22,934
 I just don't know
 how I'm gonna tell him.

414
00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:24,767
I'll do it.
  Oh, thank you.

415
00:20:24,834 --> 00:20:26,834
 I know
 how to handle him.
 It'll be easy.

416
00:20:26,901 --> 00:20:28,667
Easy?
  Not easy.

417
00:20:28,734 --> 00:20:30,767
   Losing a woman like you,
   he'll be crushed.

418
00:20:30,834 --> 00:20:32,501
   Crushed? I don't want
   him to be crushed!
   Okay, I'll just marry him.

419
00:20:32,567 --> 00:20:35,868
No. No. No. Nina.
Think about it.

420
00:20:35,934 --> 00:20:38,467
  We both know
  you can't marry my dad.

421
00:20:38,534 --> 00:20:39,734
  (SIGHS)

422
00:20:41,100 --> 00:20:42,868
Okay, then I won't.

423
00:20:43,968 --> 00:20:45,701
Okay, it's settled?

424
00:20:47,634 --> 00:20:48,734
   Okay.

425
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:51,234
 Hey, Dennis.

426
00:20:51,300 --> 00:20:52,567
   Yeah.

427
00:20:52,634 --> 00:20:55,667
 It would have been nice
 having you for a stepson.

428
00:20:55,734 --> 00:20:59,033
  Well, it would have been nice
  having you as a stepmom.

429
00:20:59,100 --> 00:21:00,167
  All right,
  I'll marry him.

430
00:21:00,234 --> 00:21:01,300
No!

431
00:21:11,968 --> 00:21:15,300
 * Life keeps bringing me
 back to you

432
00:21:16,434 --> 00:21:20,033
 * Keeps bringing me home

433
00:21:20,100 --> 00:21:23,167
    * It don't matter
    what I wanna do

434
00:21:23,234 --> 00:21:28,133
   * 'Cause it's got
   a mind of its own

435
00:21:29,868 --> 00:21:33,968
 * Life keeps bringing me
 back to you *